Do not accept the propaganda

We all have fear. Period. It is a struggle to honestly face our fears. Others project their fears on us which makes it even more difficult to overcome our own.

But the truth is that when others lash out, stand firm in your own love of self and refuse to acknowledge them, quietly yet with conviction.

With every acknowledgement that we are not are others sometimes portray us because of their fears, we grow stronger, more empathic and peaceful.

We are all highly valuable. We all deserve unconditional acceptance. Don’t settle for anything less.


Crazy 8 or Figure 8

8 year chip

Observation and reflection seem to be at the top of my mind over that past several weeks.   Today marks 8 years of sobriety.  While some might say congrats or nice job or good for you, but it truly is a celebration of personal responsibility.  It is accounting for the damage done, the amends made, humility accepted and God’s direction at the front of everyday.  That is the tall task.  That is the responsibility of sobriety.  It is far less about not drinking, but about continuing the life long process of clearing out the old debris of the past that has caused a need to self-medicate, living present each and every day to be keenly aware of those old faults that can send me into the old spiral and giving back to who I can serve now and in the future.  It is about being cognoscente of people’s pain.  Keeping ego in check as to prevent steam rolling other out of my need to be recognized.  Appreciating what I have verses what I wish I had.  Loving intensely those who have granted me their friendship and loyalty, my family and clients.  Who are trusting me to guide them, be their friend and teammate.

Life still can be either a crazy 8 or a beautiful figure 8.  But no matter which it is on any given day, there is so much to be grateful for.  Even the smallest of things like the first cup of coffee in the morning or the fresh smell of the desert air after a rain.

Eight years is a milestone and a dangerous time.  Observation and reflection are so necessary to keep me grounded and aware that life and sobriety are fragile.  Only with God’s help do I live life one day at a time.  I am blessed beyond measure.  I am hopeful that my experiences, failures and victories can be an example to help others that are desperately in need of hope, joy and recovery.

Tenth Step Amends Prayer

“God, please forgive me for my failings today. I know that because of my failings, I was not able to be as effective as I could have been for you. Please forgive me and help me live thy will better today.  I ask you now to show me how to correct the errors I have just outlined. Guide me and direct me. Please remove my arrogance and my fear. Show me how to make my relationships right and grant me the humility and strength to do thy will.”(86:1)

Thanksgiving: A Pathway out of Insanity

Thanksgiving. An American tradition. Massive meals, prequel to ridiculous shopping, hectic travel and the darkness of isolation. What? Yes, isolation. Busyness, the true escape from reality. We surround ourselves with people, work feverishly to clean, cook, make small talk, shop, fight crowds and in the end can be exhausted physically and emotionally. Sound like insanity repeated year after year.

A different perspective? A pathway out. The name of the holiday is the definition of the way out of darkness and insanity. Thanksgiving, gratitude, giving, reflecting on the infinite blessings poured on us. I know if I reflect, I could write a gratitude list a mile long. A sample would be, the color orange, sunrise, sunset, clothing, food, shelter, faith, forgiveness, sobriety, the gym, kids, new friends and on and on.

Instead of living in the cycles that pull us into our darkness, focus daily on the blessings. Write them down. Savor the moment. Thank our Creator for your calling and gifts. It can be liberating.